Where my mind doesn't really know just when to quit it. quit this whole anger business thing. I let them foolish thoughts conquer me again. This time they managed to fill these weary eyes with tears I didn't know existed. I am beginning to unravel.To release nuclear-like bursts of emotions into the ever so cold night air.
Sometimes I wonder why no one really fought for me. No one really came running and screaming towards me, thinking I'm the ONE. No, knowing that I am the ONE. The only ONE.I want so badly to be pursued but I am just too god damned selective to let just anyone chase after me. Or perhaps I am an acquired taste. Perhaps I am just vain and pretentious. Perhaps I'm a load of bullshit.
I thought they were the ones. Boy, aren't I childish. One's too fucking broken and the other is just so fucking self absorbed.They don't see me.Or at least see the things I wanted them to see.
I never said I chose solitude. I never said I crave for this emptiness. I said I wanted things calm, I never prayed for this desert. This mundane isolation.
I don't want to kill myself. But my life lack the very reason as to why I'm here.I feel so pointless and stupid sometimes. I feel so lost.And nothing is convincing enough.
Sometimes a suicide feels like the perfect birthday present.
No comments:
Post a Comment